My Mind is Wondering

There are days when I feel like why am I alive? But there is no one to answer this question. What life has made out of me, is the only thing which am bearing and just continuing living. The one thing is very clear to me now that this is not a nice place to live in. you must be thinking what is this person is talking about, if you look into my shoes, I can guarantee that you would never try to touch my shoes. They are not smelly, but they are bleeding, they are crying, longing for a friend. A friend, what friend here doesn’t mean that I need a sex partner, what I mean is that a person to whom I can lean on, a person in front of whom I cry like baby, and I don’t feel that one day that person will leave me at the center of the road to die alone, crying in bed alone, the tears which I can’t show to the world and people around me.  Even though I always post status on snapchat and whatsApp, about I need a friend and my world of people always take it as a joke. They don’t know how empty I am from inside, how desperate I am to have a friend. I have seen people have friends forever, at every age that friend or friends are with them at every hour of need. They smile, joke around, have fun, which made me feel sad. The sadness which I can’t even share with anyone, with whom should I share. I don’t even have any imaginary friend to talk to. You must be thinking in such an advance era what this person is talking. All these development in technology doesn’t fill the gap which widen up with the passage of time.